Eat What You Want And Die Like A Man: The World's Unhealthiest...

Features

• Cover Type: Paperback with 284 pages
• Published by: Citadel Press July 1, 2008
• Written in: English
• ISBN 10 Number: 0806528680
• ISBN 13 Number: 978-0806528687
• Book Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.5 x 0.9 inches
• Weighs: 9.6 ounces

Product Description
Eat healthy and live to be 100?.


Screw that.


Why choke down bland, mushy steamed veggies and brown rice when there s so much fat-laden, calorie-rich, heart-bursting cuisine out there to be savored? Because you want to live? So you can spend your golden years wandering aimlessly around a Florida shopping mall and eating dinner at 2 in the afternoon? So your rotten, ungrateful kids can plop you into some hellhole of a nursing home the minute you forget what day it is?

So go ahead, triple your cholesterol and triglyceride counts and clog those arteries . You ll never get out of this world alive, so you might as well enjoy your life while you can. Here are thirty artery-clogging, colon-blistering recipes sure to satisfy the most insatiable cholesterol craving. Instead of, steamed tofu, try Lard-Oozing Caja-China-Roasted Hog or Pizzeria-style Baked Ziti with Sausage and Mozzarella!. Follow up with a decadent dessert of Deep-Fried Twinkies or Ice Cream Lasagne. You ll die quicker but with a smile on your face.

Eat What You Want and Die Like a Man will put you back in touch with your Inner Hog.

Raves for Steve Graham s THE GOOD, THE SPAM, AND THE UGLY


"Gleefully offensive." --Publishers Weekly


"Thanks for using a pseudonym." --Steve s father

Download Description
Tired of tofu? Sick of salad? REVOLT! Eat What You Want and Die Like a Man will put you back in touch with your Inner Hog.

This collection of humor essays by Miami-area writer Steve H. Graham contains about two dozen recipes that are as deadly as they are delicious.

Learn to make treats such as yeast-raised doughnuts deep-fried in lard, chicken-fried ribeye on a giant bacon-grease biscuit, coconut flan with seven egg yolks, five-hundred-calorie brownies, and hash-brown Yukon Gold casserole with cheese and over a pint of sour cream.

This book should come with a Biohazard decal!

Reader Reviews
I wrote this book. Ignore the lame first edition from Iuniverse. This edition is twice as big and much better. Sorry about the lame Amazon text; we're trying to fix it. This is the new edition, which is a thousand times better than the old one. From the press release: Writer Steve H. Graham (The Good, the Spam and the Ugly) has just published his long-awaited masterpiece, Eat What You Want and Die Like a Man - The World's Unhealthiest Cookbook! Contains over thirty deadly, well-explained recipes. Buy it now at Amazon.com or your local bookstore. Graham spent five years developing a slew of delicious, heart-hammering recipes sure to brighten the lives of weary, henpecked males everywhere. Each recipe is explained in detail; so simple, even a man can do it. Here are some examples. * Perfect 10-minute New York street pizza! Graham found out which ingredients the pros use, and his pal Mike contributed a perfect method for baking a pizzeria-style crust. If you have an oven and a pizza stone, you can do this. Better than any pizzeria near you, and the cost is a fraction of what pizzerias charge. * World's best blueberry cheesecake! These days, cheesecakes are full of disgusting vegetable shortening, and they taste like earwax. Graham got fed up and created a recipe that will bring you to your knees. Forget light, airy cheesecakes. This one weighs as much as a baby. * Five-hundred-and-forty-calorie brownies made with extra butter! Most brownie recipes taste like a sponge. Graham does it right, with real butter, extra sugar, and an optional layer of coconut in the middle. Women will break into your home to get these. * Home-aged steaks no steakhouse can touch! Don't buy the lies the steakhouse industry puts out. They don't get the best meat. They don't have special equipment you can't buy. They don't have special skills. Thanks to Steve H. Graham, you can put them to shame. Fix a better steak at home for half the price, easily, quickly, and without leaving a lot of dishes and cookware to wash. Added bonus: a simple recipe for the world's best baked potato. * French fries, fried twice in beef fat! The way McDonald's used to make them. You haven't had fries until you've had these fries. * Apricot-and-sage-glazed whole hog, with rice, raisin, and Marsala stuffing. You think a turkey is an impressive holiday meal? Wait till you serve your guests an entire glazed pig, bursting with delicious stuffing. Turkeys are for the weak. A stuffed pig is an event. Publisher's Weekly calls Steve H. Graham "gleefully offensive" and "wildly inappropriate"! Select quotes: "If you have a food processor, it takes about as much effort as persuading a Frenchman not to bathe." "You need a horse hypodermic ... it's for injecting flavor into the meat, and you can also scare the kids with it." "Tom Cruise isn't really gay. I told him Tom had a baby and even tried to eat the afterbirth." "I like ziti. It's spaghetti for morons." Comment | | (Report this)